Thread:Ursuul/@comment-29771477-20171219024003/@comment-29771477-20171220142217

ALright, here it is..... :S

(disclaimer: peter and cole are two people who became friends who hated each other before, because cole beat up peter so bad he nearly died, and then peter became suicidal, but then they got to be friends in that book)

ENEMIES CAN BECOME FRIENDS

Do you have any close friends that you used to hate? Chances are, you do. But, what did they do to make you hate them? How much would you want to befriend that same person if they beat you to within an inch of your life? What if they shot and killed one of your best friends? At a glance, Peter and Cole’s relationship at the end of Touching Spirit Bear seems impossible to transform into a healthy friendship, which is understandable. Nonetheless, I believe it has a good chance of surviving. So long as enemies acknowledge their wrongs and learn to embrace their archnemesis’ flaws, truly awesome things can happen. In my opinion, enemies can become friends.

For instance, almost anyone who has read Touching Spirit Bear will agree that Peter and Cole’s friendship is strange and rather rocky. After all, most civilians wouldn’t want to become close with someone that nearly killed them, even if they got revenge like Peter did. Seeing that Peter still has lingering animosity towards Cole and is also severely depressed, there’s a small chance their friendship will crash and burn. And yet, I think there’s a great chance they’ll have a good, healthy friendship because they’re allowing each other to fix their mistakes! Unlike before, Peter and Cole are expressing tolerance and concern towards each other. Surely Peter and Cole were enemies before, but because they have forgiven each other, these enemies can become friends.

To further demonstrate my point, there is a story that I’m very fond of which I found from my favourite game developer, Nicky Case. In particular, it’s a story about trench warfare where approximately 100,000 soldiers fighting in WWI agreed to have a truce for Christmas. These soldiers were ordered not to fraternise with the enemy, yet they decided to played games like soccer, sing Christmas carols, exchange gifts, and eat Christmas dinner with each other instead! You’re probably wondering how it’s possible that these people who likely shot each other’s closest friends ate Christmas dinner together; Hitler himself found the temporary truce disgusting. Indeed, they saw the humanness in their enemies and decided that a truce rather than more killings and pain was the way to go. Furthermore, some historians have argued that if the soldiers could have ended the war then, they would have. Nicky Case says the takeaway from this story is that there’s three main “ingredients” we need for enemies to become friends: an element of trust, repeated interactions, and mutual effort put forth towards a win-win situation, and I agree. With this in mind, enemies can become friends.

By the same token, a respected author named Charles A. Kupchan wrote a book supporting my thesis called “How Enemies Become Friends: The Sources of Stable Peace”. In short, it states that sworn enemies can become friends if they work hard at it and have tolerance for each other, even on the national level. In addition, a quick google search reveals that the main points supporting his thesis are almost identical to Nicky Case’s; the three things we need for enemies to become friends are an element of trust, repeated interactions, and mutual effort. Although he adds a thought I disagree with (one party must be ‘backed against a wall’), I think that the rest of his points are morally sound and logical. If Case and Kupchan’s list of needs are met, enemies can surely become friends.

All things considered, Pete and Cole will likely become good friends, as long as they learn to truly forgive each other. Even though some may argue that a friendship between two boys who have beaten each other nearly to death is doomed to fail, I strongly disagree. Peter and Cole’s relationship obviously has the three “ingredients” needed for a healthy friendship between two people who were enemies in the past. Remember to take caution, and don’t judge enemies’ friendships (like Cole and Peter’s) based on their cover.

Touching Spirit Bear, by Ben Mikaelsen: [link] Christmas Truce: [link] The Evolution of Trust, by Nicky Case: [link] How Enemies Become Friends, by Charles A. Kupchan: [link]

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