"All at once, or none at all..."
The Ballistic Barricade has three members, all who are extremely powerful Hesperians who share an uncanny bond that makes them actually undefeatable under normal circumstances: they can't die unless all three are defeated at the exact same time. Not within a few seconds of each other, not even within the same second - this aspect makes them practically invincible. So much, in fact, that Lord Sassafras decided to put their qualities to good use: Instead of making them members of the Sassa Club, which they might have filled the roles quite well of, Lord Sassafras did not want to project the image of Hesperians being thought of as a nigh-unstoppable race (although this is all too true in actuality, such a conclusion would be rapidly reached in a different way if one were to face the Ballistic Barricade and assume most Hesperians were like them.) Lord Sassafras then gave them the greatest "honor" of guarding his treasures - while such a role might not seem that much of a prestigious position, being trapped in a sub-dimension with no one but battle-minded Legionnaires, Half 'n Hat, and Trianglows for company, the Ballistic Barricade understand their role very well.
Triangular Funk is the strategist and damage-dealer of the group, bringing in waves of triangular Hesperian Minions against their enemies. Hospice is the healer and seems to have no end to how much health he can heal his teammates while moving around at high speed and possessing medium armor. Double Sharp is the tank, taking in vast quantities of damage and expelling more bullets than even Diepmon can muster at times back out.
Hospice has 44,000 health in 8-player mode and 88,000 health in 16-player mode. He has a massive shield on his front that absorbs 80% of all damage that hits it. Hospice himself has a base 20% damage reduction and deals 40 HP of body damage on contact.
Hospice's role as healer means that he needs to be able to evade attacks. Thus, he uses the stacked Streamliner cannons on his rear sides to propel himself around at high speeds roughly equal to that of a Fallen Booster's. During his Reflexive Stance, the spawners in the middle of his rear summon purple Sassafras Minions that always have one eye, wearing hats that look like Half 'n Hat. These Minions will fire healing bullets at the Ballistic Barricade, healing them for a meager 10 HP per bullet. However, the bullets are fired quite rapidly, so taking out the Minions is a priority.
Triangular Funk has 35,000 health in 8-player mode and 70,000 health in 16-player mode. He has a base 15% damage reduction and deals 45 HP of body damage on contact.
His Spread Shot/Twin-like Auto Turrets on his front, each of which has 16 barrels, can lay down an absolute bullet hell of ammunition across a 210-degree effective range. Adding to this are two smaller barrels toward his front corner that fire high-speed bullets that have 25% more damage and penetration than the other barrels. On his rear, Triangular Funk has a huge trap launcher and two massive Machine Gun barrels that fire out Destroyer bullets at the rate of a Machine Gun. However, the trap launcher only fires during his Reflexive Stance, and the Destroyer bullets have 50% reduced damage and have a very short range before disappearing. Triangular Funk also spawns triangular two-eyed minions with two barrels on a leading corner from a spawner on his back.
Double Sharp has 58,000 health in 8-player mode and 112,000 health in 16-player mode. He has a base 35% damage reduction and inflicts 50 HP of body damage on contact.
Double Sharp has eight individual weapons across his four-petal pinwheel body. His Vulcan autocannons lay down an impressive amount of spam, but the Streamliner cannons, which can revolve independently of their Vulcan bases, allow Double Sharp to lay down either a dense, night-impenetrable bullet shield or focus on up to eight targets at a time. All weapons coupled together, in addition to his four eyes, make Double Sharp an excellent defensive player, able to see threats from all sides.
Once all players have entered the final chamber, a cutscene plays where one player moves toward the rear vault door. Suddenly, Double Sharp materializes and whaps the player with his cannons, followed by Hospice and Triangular Funk materializing on either side of him. Players are now guaranteed the first hit on any member, as the battle will not actually start unless any member of the Ballistic Barricade is damaged.
There is no way to individually whittle down the Ballistic Barricade. If any member reaches 0 HP, it will cause an instantaneous cutscene where the other two members revive their teammate with IE Energy to FULL HEALTH and keep on fighting. It may seem impossible to defeat all three members at the same time... or is it? There are two methods to do so:
- Burn all three down evenly and hit all three with a high-damage instantaneous AoE attack. Some classes have abilities with cooldowns that approach 5 minutes, but can deal up to about 3000 damage in one hit; these should be used to land the killing blow. But beware: If any boss isn't killed, they will revive the other (even if two are defeated, the remaining one will revive both!)
- Use a unique mechanic that takes the phrase "defeat at the same exact time" to a literal standpoint. On the battle room's opposite wall from the entrance (it is a spicy hexagonal room,) there is a painted carving of two mysterious figures from Hesperian lore. Who these two figures are is unknown, but damaging this will cause the figures' eyes to flash and stop time for 15 seconds, freezing the entire Ballistic Barricade and their minions. This enables players to defeat the Barricade all at the same time. Get it? Technically, since time is stopped, and if players manage to defeat them within the 15-second timeframe, they will all be unable to act and revive each other. However, this time stop ability has a cooldown of 60 seconds that starts from when the effect ends.
Each of the Ballistic Barricade has three behavioral patterns instead of a complicated attack select
because I'm too lazy to try and make 30 attacks across all three bosses because certain AI combinations allow the Ballistic Barricade to adopt a certain stance. For each member, they can use a defensive, offensive, or reflexive behavior, which grant passive buffs/debuffs to the boss using it as follows:
- Offensive: +2% damage, +2% movement speed.
- Defensive: +2% damage reduction, -1% movement speed.
- Reflexive: +1% damage reduction, +1% damage, +1% movement speed.
However, there's more. On top of individual modifiers, the current combination of stances across the Ballistic Barricade also grants them additional modifiers that affect the whole group. The modifiers across the entire group are added up and doubled, and that is applied on top of the individual modifiers for extra boosts. An example is as follows: Hospice is in Offensive stance, Double Sharp is in Defensive Stance, and Triangular Funk is in Reflexive Stance. This grants the entire group +6% damage, +4% movement speed, and 6% damage reduction on top of their individual buffs; therefore, Hospice in his Offensive stance would receive a cumulative +8% damage, +6% movement speed, and +6% damage reduction.
Confusing? Yes. Makes the fight harder? Yes.
- Offensive Stance: Hospice uses his shield and rear Streamliner cannons to ram into players at high speed. He travels in a straight line at 250% his normal movement speed for up to 80 tiles before turning and charging again within 3 seconds.
- Defensive Stance: Hospice's shield flashes silver as all damage fired at it will be completely nullified. He progressively heals the other two members for 5% of their maximum HP over the next 45 seconds while remaining stationary, rotating to face the largest group of players to defend himself as much as possible. He also fires his rear cannons to ward off attackers from behind.
- Reflexive Stance: Hospice takes cover behind the other two members of the Barricade, spawning in 8 Sassafras Minions that have 800 (1600 in 16-player modes) health each. These Minions do not attack players; rather, the eight Minions split into two groups of four. One group of four goes to heal the boss with the least amount of health, while the other set of Minions split evenly between the other two bosses. Hospice himself dashes around, trying to avoid players. The Minions rapidly fire green bullets that heal for 10 HP each; players can be hit by these bullets to heal themselves as well. However, it is recommended to dispatch the Minions as quickly as possible, as they can upset the balance of health if left to do what they do best for too long.
- Offensive Stance: Triangular Funk rotates his many barrels towards the front, firing a spread of bullets that travel a good distance before disappearing. His Destroyer barrels on his rear also fire at random to ensure short bursts of speed.
- Defensive Stance: Triangular Funk summons 3 of his triangular minions, each of whom have 1400 (2800) health. They move to the front to offer some cover fire while Triangular Funk moves backward, ensuring that his bullet spray allows for a defensive wall.
- Reflexive Stance: Triangular Funk increases his movement speed by 175%, darting in front of his teammates to lay a line of tough Mega Traps that have a whopping 5000 (10000) health each. These disappear after 60 seconds. He also summons 3 more minions that orbit around him wildly, firing their bullets outwards at players.
- Offensive Stance: Double Sharp rotates his cannons and focuses on four players at a time with them. He will try to remain in front of his teammates while doing this, gaining an additional 4% damage reduction buff while doing so.
- Defensive Stance: Double Sharp folds his cannons inwards and starts spinning slowly on the spot, creating a spiral storm of dense, fast-moving bullets. These bullets inflict Slowed and medium damage on hit.
- Reflexive Stance: The barrels on Double Sharp's weapons glow red as he increases his fire rate by 225%, focusing on anywhere from one to four targets. The lower his health is, the more likely he is to focus on a lower number of targets.
If all three members of the Barricade are destroyed while time-frozen, when the timer runs out, all three start to have white cracks forming around their body before calamitously exploding into IE Energy, always in the order of Hospice, Triangular Funk, and Double Sharp. However, if they are destroyed with an AoE outside of the time freeze, their eyes all simultaneously go wide as they explode at the exact same time.
- Each member of the Ballistic Barricade represents a user on this wiki: