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"According to all known laws of aviation..."

"According to all known laws of aviation..."

"According to all known laws of aviation..."

"According to all known laws of aviation..."

(simultaneously)

"OOOOOooooooOOOOOOOHHHH HEXY HEX HEXY-EN, YOU-AAAAA SOoooooOOOOooOOo SPICeEEeeEeeeEY!"

Overview

Sassafras Supreme is a synthetic "improvement" over the infamous Polygon Boss (and secretly an entire race whose common form is this) known as Sassafras, and was created by the really mad doctor (no, really, this time he's insane for creating this thing, probably against his will by a mysterious force) as a mass IE Energy gathering machine of the highest order and to irritate Hexen past his limits experiment to determine the upper limit of annoyance and irritation that most rational beings can take.

Sassafras Supreme is 2.4x larger than Sassafras, twice as large as Hexen (who obviously doesn't appreciate the creation of Sassafras Supreme) and comes with approximately 412.2571% more obnoxiousness (and noxiousness, for that matter.) Several Sassafras themes will overlap each other as players get closer to Sassafras Supreme, creating a veritable cacophony.

Design

Sassafras Supreme has the same body layout as Sassafras: a tan hexagon body and six large spawners that take up each of his sides. There is also one big black eye with a yellow pupil in the middle that looks around. However, that's where the similarities end. Sassafras Supreme has three smaller eyes that look like the big one, forming a triangle around it (the smaller eyes are in line with the Dominator turrets.) Each of the turrets has another barrel opposite the first, so there are two weapons on each turret instead of one, like a Flank Guard's layout. Sassafras Supreme's spawners each have three drone spawners spaced evenly jutting out of them. These spawners spawn Battleship drones that disappear after 12 seconds and do no damage. They simply serve a purpose to push things around. Sassafras Supreme likes to direct these drones into various formations like arms and legs.

Behavior

DiepmonSassafras Supreme Sizeup

Sassafras Supreme compared to a normal Sassafras and Hexen, all to scale.

Sassafras Supreme will wander around surprisingly quickly, looking around at players with the glowing yellow pupils in its four black eyes. It will spin slowly as well, like an Auto 5.

The Trapper barrels fire out significantly larger Mega Traps and the Dominator barrels will track the closest player. The Dominator bullets, which are actually the right size, will explode into a ring of sixteen normal-sized bullets four seconds after fire if no contact was made with a player.

DiepmonSassafras Supreme Minion

A Sassafras Supreme minion.

Sassafras Supreme's main spawners will shoot out small brown hexagonal Minions called 'Supreme Sassafras Minion', that get into groups and gun down players. They have 5 Gunner barrels, an Auto Turret with one barrel and a hexagon body, and are also scaled to the size of Sassafras Supreme (and as a result, are half the size of normal Sassafras.) They also have a small Sassafras eye on them, and as opposed to Sassafras Minions, there is only one kind. When a Supreme Sassafras Minion is destroyed, all other Supreme Sassafras Minions will get the Frenzy buff for 2 seconds. He will spawn these all the time, with a limit of 6 and replacing one as soon as it is defeated. Each has 1000 health. Every minion will say the word 'Sassafras' every few seconds, louder than normal Sassafras minions and more frequently.

Sassafras Supreme has the exact same quote blabbering mechanics as Sassafras, however, his voice is much louder, he talks much more frequently, and he will occasionally make random loud and obnoxious noises. Very rarely, Sassafras Supreme will say a quote, switching between quiet and ear-splitting volumes randomly while he is saying it (rip headphone users). It also sounds like four voices are talking at once when Sassafras Supreme says things (or makes weird sounds.)

When Sassafras Supreme is near Hexen's Hexagon Fortress in Melancholy Forest (which is where Dr. Lacus usually drops him, although he can drop Sassafras Supreme anywhere in the Realm), he increases his talk rate by 300%, saying things over each other (while the multiple overlapping Sassafras themes are still active, and annoying the heck out of anything that's near him.) Within 3-5 minutes of Sassafras Supreme's spawn, Hexen will burst out of his fortress, Invincible, and attack Sassafras Supreme (with his abilities) to end it quickly. While this is happening, Sassafras Supreme starts chanting "OH HEXEN YOU-A SO SPICY" and variations of it every fifth quote he says. Players cannot hurt Hexen, and the only thing they can do is to help him take down Sassafras Supreme. When either a player or Hexen defeats Sassafras, Hexen will rush back into his fortress and close the doors with a slam.

Trivia

  • This started out as a joke, but it spawned an entire storyline...
    • Sassafras Supreme was the first boss to be created of what would become the Rise of Hesperia DLC, featuring way too many Sassafras and Hesperia-related things.
  • Sassafras Supreme's original name was Sassafras X, but that was deemed a name too bland for a boss of this caliber.
  • An example of a boss that isn't difficult to beat, but still may make people ragequit if they can't understand that muting sounds is the easiest way to combat it.
  • To hear what fighting this boss sounds like, press "Play" on the soundcloud link on this page, open a new tab to Sassafras Supreme's theme on Soundcloud, turn the volume up to max (actually, DON'T), and enjoy (or mute your computer noises, like a rational person should do!)
  • If Sassafras Supreme does spawn near Hexen's fortress, any player in a large area around it will hear the overlapping Sassafras themes, and anyone who knocks on the door before 3-5 minutes have passed will get Hexen yelling something about Sassafras Supreme and cursing Dr. Lacus for doing it again.
  • There can only be one Sassafras Supreme active in The Realm at one time, as it is a singular entity. This is not the case in the Realm of Sassafras...
    • However, if Sassafras Supreme does spawn near the fortress while Hexen is fighting, players nearby will see Sassafras Supreme rushing into the fortress, blowing open the doors, destroying the thorn mine barrier blocking the entrance to Hexen's battle room, and start blabbering his four eyes off with quotes to annoy Hexen. Regardless of where he is in the fight, Hexen will say a series of angry quotes, become Invincible, and any of Hexen's minions (including bosses) will join him in chasing Sassafras Supreme out of the fortress to kill it. They will completely ignore players, but since Hexen is Invincible, don't bother fighting him. Afterwards, once Sassafras Supreme is killed, a special transmission from the Polygon Mother will occur, Hexen returns to the fortress, and his fortress will get reset. However, this spawn only has a 1/100 chance to occur during Hexen's fight. All of this while Sassafras Supreme is chanting "OH HEXEN, YOU-A SO SPICY" and variations of it every other thing he says, instead of every fifth like above (and his speech is still overlapping.)
  • Sassafras Supreme gathers the second-most amount of IE energy from sentient-designated entities and players at a rate of 10 units per each of the above every 10 seconds in a 150 tile radius, second only to Derpii at 12 units every 10 seconds for each of the players fighting her.
  • Sassafras Supreme has masculine programming. Also, unforunately, yes, he is sentient and self-aware in reveling in how much irritation he causes to everyone around him.
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